Pimpin ain't easy...

It's true... No matter where you are, no matter what the conditions - pimpin AIN'T easy. Haha!

This picture was taken yesterday in Dammerjog, Djibouti. The trains here are used for people-transport. This is like the Amtrak of Djibouti. People jump on moving trains, they sit on the top, they hang off the back, they pile in the box cars. It's insane. But I've learned something in my travels - - - in EVERY community in the world, there is one person who chose buying a pimp hat over buying a mirror.

Check out that hat! And look at his stance. NO ONE here stands up straight. But this guy? He's ALL over it. Pimp hat. Pimp stance. If I had to caption this photo, I'd just assume that Mr. P-I-M-P was getting ready to shake down the man in white. But hey, that's just me!

(Photo courtesy of Air Force photographer extraordinaire J.T. Lock - proof that one pimp will ALWAYS recognize another!)

Musings from the front

Things here have been hectic but good. I will be traveling to Uganda and then Kenya and will be out of touch for the first three weeks of April... But remember the rule - no news is good news.

Last night was my first English Discussion Group. It was an amazing experience and one I plan to take part in often! We went to a one-room school house (literally) that was packed with people.

This group was mostly males between 16 and 24, but there were a handful of women as well. The students pick the topics (last night was health and how their country can develop) and then we talk conversationally, writing key words on a board in the front and letting them (kindly) correct each other.

I was moved by how passionate they are about life. They see the situation they're in and know they want better. And they are working so hard to better their lives. They listen to Voice of America radio just to learn more conversational English and enjoy the weekly exchanges they get with actual Americans.

I received my first care package on Sunday! It was, and I quote, "enough pesticides to conduct a bug holocaust on all my areas..." but it was wonderful to receive mail (thank you Scotty!) from home. Now I just need someone willing to send me a Swiffer Wet Jet to clean my CLU (it is NOT an apartment!) so that maybe I don't be afraid to take my shoes off at the end of the day. I tried to order one on drugstore.com but they won't ship to an FPO for that item. Hmmmm... Go figure. I have the Wet Jet liquid and plenty of pads here. They shipped THOSE. But they won't ship the actual apparatus.

On to much more somber news... We lost a Marine on Easter Sunday. LCpl Dustin Canham was 22 years old and he and his wife were married just 5 months ago. I can not imagine the agony his family must feel knowing that they will never see their loved one again. And somehow, it seems to me that receiving the news on Easter is a double blow. So I ask that tonight and every night you keep the Canhams and all of America's service members and their families in your prayers.

Snorkeling off the coast of Africa

Well, the powers that be at Camp Lemonier* decided the perfect way for 1,800 adults to celebrate Easter was to have the Easter Bunny make an appearance. Because, really, what better way is there to remind us all that we're away from our children for yet another holiday? But really, that's not the point of today's blog...

If there is a way to turn a deployment supporting the Global War on Terror into a sightseeing trip, you all know I'll find it. I did not fly all this way (and survive a rather rough cop-and-feel session with TSA) to not SEE Africa while I was in Africa.

Yesterday was my first day off since before leaving Little Rock. A group of five of us jumped on an MWR-sponsored trip to Moucha Island (a small island off the coast of Djibouti). And it was amazing. On the boat-ride out, we even saw dolphins (yes Amanda, even the dolphins are black in Africa).

We stole some ice from the chow hall, brought a cooler and some music, packed a few towels and we were set. Amanda (our legal council), Cindy (the resident videographer), JT (combat camera and the 2007 Air Force photographer of the year!), Ian (my photojournalist) and myself made up the motley crew. And a perfect crew it was. There was no drama - no bickering, no fights, no temper tantrums. Just sun, sand, and smiles. If I didn't look too closely at my surroundings, I could have been on a beach anywhere - Cabo, Tahiti, Pensacola.

I learned to swim when I was 5 and I don't think I was much older than 7 when my dad first taught me to snorkel. That is something I am very grateful for. We spent $6 a piece to rent rather new snorkel equipment and off we went. As the tide went out, we were no more than 5 feet above the reefs at points. We saw a baby stingray, a giant clam, eels, and every fish you can imagine. It was like swimming through the saltwater tank in your dentist's office. (Not MY dentist's office though, because my dentist currently operates out of a tent just down the gravel path from my office.) There were schools of silverfish and angel fish of every size.

Being that this island is located on the surface of the sun, sunblock was a necessity. I wouldn't describe my skin as translucent, but I will say that I might have glowed under a black light before yesterday's adventure. I applied the SPF 30 diligently - every 30 minutes. I used one full bottle. And it was new. But still.... I got color. I'm tan in most places now, but there are some spots (like the tops of my feet!!!!) that didn't fare as well. But I'll take it - because I can now say I snorkeled off the coast of Eastern Africa. And really, how many people do we know that can say that?

My goal while I'm here is to work hard and play hard. I focus on the mission, but given the chance, I am going to see every thing that there is to see. I refuse to turn down an opportunity to leave this camp - even if it's to visit the Somalia Refugee Camps that border our base. I figure (and hope) that I will never been back to Africa, so I plan to see it all this time around.

Next stop - Uganda. I will be sure to take a lot of photos while we're down there (It's me, Cindy and JT for that trip) and I hope to be able to post some of the articles I'll be doing on our missions out there. Next month I'll be in Kenya as well. So there is a lot of travel ahead. I'll keep you all posted as the time goes on.

* Camp Lemonier is my home for these 6 months. It's pronounced "Lemonade" but without the D and with an obnoxious French accent.

AND MIDGETS* TOO

STOP! If you haven't read the monkey blog, please scroll down and read the blog entry just below this one. It will help you, trust me. Now, let's carry on...

I CAN COME HOME NOW!!!! My life is almost complete! Yesterday, at 9:30 a.m. I saw monkeys. And then.... wait for it... at 9:30 last night - I SAW A MIDGET. Not only did I SEE a midget, I took my photo with her.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. In this case, that picture was worth a thousand Djiboutian francs. We went out to Djibouti City as an office last night for Jen and Wes's going away dinner. If you have ever been to a Mexican boarder town, that is a lot like what Djibouti City is. But worse. There are people hawking things on every corner. And in the middle of the streets. Lots of panhandling and lots of crap trinkets for more money than they're worth. Lots of kids yelling something that I think is the Somalia equivalent of "Chicklet...chicklet..." but I don't speak the language yet, so I don't know.

The little African midget woman was selling cigarettes and necklaces, neither of which I wanted. But she WAS more than willing to pose for a photo with me - for a price. And hey, I'm not above paying for what I consider an experience of a lifetime. I've waited 33 years for midgets and monkeys. And to be able to have both, in one day, in AFRICA was really the highlight of my trip thus far. What can I say, I set my sights low (hehe, no pun intended.)

Dinner was bad pizza at an expensive price. And we got ripped off - twice. And had to pay someone to "watch" our vehicle before we could get back into it. And I think we almost died twice on the road. Um... 4 lanes and no traffic laws. I'm not lying. No traffic laws at all. It's like the bumper cars at Knot's Berry Farm mixed in a little with 13 year boys on Go Karts - driving blindfolded. We had to avoid Djiboutians on bikes. And men in skirts and flip-flops. And goats. And dogs. And a truck full of camels (man I wish I had my eyes open and camera ready for THAT picture. But I was knee deep in my 14th round of Our Fathers at that point and just praying we made it there safely. I DID not fly all this way to die in a van versus camel accident 10 clicks from the front gate!)

On a side note, I get a 96 hour liberty pass while I'm here and there is a group of us thinking of taking a safari in Tanzania in late May as a "happy birthday to me" and a happy birthday to Cindy too. Her birthday is a month after mine, but we're afraid if we split the difference and try to go in late June, we both might just catch fire. She's as fair and blonde as I am and we both might spontaneously combust if we get THAT close to the sun. Rumor has it that it's still a bit cool (hahahahahaha - as compared to the surface of the sun maybe) in May and therefore more bearable. I know the thought of four girls on safari in Tanzania might be a scary thought for some people. But don't worry - I'm planning accordingly. We are looking for a fifth person now. And we're auditioning based on body composition and physical fitness scores - we need a cubby girl who can't run. You know that if we're being chased, they'll always pick off the slowest, so as long as we have someone to bait them with, we'll be fine. SEE - I AM practicing operational risk management even in my off time.

* Yes yes, Michele. I know there is a difference between "midgets" and "little people" and "dwarves." I do. But somehow, I just don't think saying "There's nothing in life funnier than achondroplasia disproportionate dwarfism and monkeys" has the same ring to it. So... for the purpose of this blog, we'll stick with "midgets and monkeys." The journalist in me feels it necessary to explain that I know the difference. But the ADHD 12 year old hiding in my brain loves the alliteration too much to stop saying it. Hehe

I SAW MONKEYS

I saw monkeys today! Okay, really, they are red-assed baboons, but it's more fun to say monkeys. It was my first true African experience. And anyone who knows me know that I love nothing more than midgets and monkeys. Rumor has it that there is a Djiboutian midget in town, so now that I've seen the monkeys, it's time to hunt out the midget. Then I can get on the next hot thing smoking out of here and say my mission was complete.

Today I went out with the Djiboutian Navy. (Navy is a loose term - they have MAYBE 200 people in their entire Navy) I rode aboard the DNS Arkansas. No. I'm not lying. You CAN'T make this stuff up folks. It is a 55' Sea Hawk that was built in none other than Monticello, Ark., bought by the Embassy here and then sold/donated/traded/whatever to the Djiboutian "Navy."

It was an interesting experience, to say the least. But they were VERY kind to me.
They were not able to say "Kati" so they called me "Ange" which, in French, loosely translates to "Angel." STOP LAUGHING! There is SOOOO much lost in translation here. And I'm sure, since I am THE whitest thing they've ever seen, I just might look angelic to them. Hehehehe. Okay, even I'm laughing at THAT.

Anyway, once we were underway (Navy speak for the boat is moving I guess) they offered me an almost cold Coke in a bottle and then each of them came out at least once to inquire about my safety. I think there was great fear among the crew that I would fall overboard at some point. And that is amazing, considering they don't even know me! Had they known me, I'm sure they would have lashed me to the railing to ensure my safety.

When we reached the Port of Obock, we met with the Commissar - which is like the governor of Obock. That is kind of silly since Obock has maybe 500 people living there. I was treated to a flat, fried pan "bread" and some grilled fish with a side of lime. Once I convinced myself that we were really just inland of Ensenada and that I was eating fresh fish tacos, the entire meal became quite appetizing. To be honest, it was GOOD. All I needed was a cold drink and I would have been set.

While there, I looked over to a fence area about 10 yards away and saw a whole pack of red-assed baboons. There were cute little babies and a big fat Alpha Male and all of them sported the best Don King coif I have ever seen. They were grooming and picking and howling. So I had to come over take photos - of course - which just tickled my Djiboutian escorts. I think it would be the equivalent of someone coming to New York and then being enthralled by the pigeons in Central Park. I guess the monkeys just don't hold the same luster for them. They don't know the joy they're missing.

I got to see where we're helping to build a sanitary meat processing plant and I toured a hospital. It was an interesting day. I WAS a little bit disappointed that our boat didn't have any flintlock pistols or cannons on board to ward off the pirates we might encounter in the gulf. But then I was doubly disappointed when we didn't actually encounter any PIRATES. Which made the lack of weaponry a moot point. Oh well... maybe next time!

Fellow PA Killed in Iraq

In every war and during every deployment there is the risk that one of our fellow servicemen may become wounded or killed. That risk has become even more clear to me.

A fellow member of my Public Affairs career field was killed Monday near Bayji, Iraq, when the Iraqi Army Mi-17 helicopter he was flying on crashed - killing all 7 aboard. Staff Sgt. Chris Frost, a PA from Kirtland Air Force Base in New Mexico was 24 when he died.

Chris was nearing the end of a 6 month tour in Iraq - he was to go home in just three weeks. Ours is a tiny career field - there are less than a few hundred of us who perform this mission (officer and enlisted) and are a tight-knit group. The loss of a tremendous PA will be felt through tout our entire field.

He will return to his home in Wisconsin early this morning to be laid to rest. The wonderful men and women of the Patriot Guard will be on hand from the time he arrives until after his funeral to ensure that he and his family receive only the deepest of respect.

I ask that tonight, and every night, you keep Chris, his two children, and all of men and women who are defending our nation in your thoughts and prayers. With the constant amount of deployments we're facing, my fear is that our being far from home and in harm's way will become "the norm..." and the loss of a great Airmen should never seem normal.

TSA 1, Kati 0

So... I learned a valuable lesson on this trip. That would be that no one who works for TSA has a sense of humor. At all! Let me explain...

I traveled in uniform. With orders. And a military ID. Got through TSA at Little Rock just fine. Cleared security at Atlanta just fine. Then I get to Norfolk. This is a military city, you'd think they would know how to do this... So here's the scene (and I'm SO not making this up!):

TSA: "You need to remove your boots"

Me: Why?

TSA: Because there are steel shanks in them

Me: And?....

TSA: "You're military - they train you to use those to kill people"

(Um? Huh? What? Now remember, I've been flying for 24 hours. I'm tired, I'm hungry and I'm flat slap-ass crazy at this point. So you'll have to forgive me for what comes next...)

Me: "No ma'am - they train us to kill using our pinkie finger, 3 ounces of Visine and the Draw 4 card from the Uno deck. But you're in luck - I left my Uno cards at home...:

Did you know that the loudest words ever spoken in an airport at "I need a female assist and a supervisor at Lane 2"?!? Yeah...

So while Prince Ali Fabulous is He Ali Abawa floats by on his rug, three women and their 19 children stream by in their Burkahs, 72 virgins and a man just short of leading livestock gets through, I'm off to the side. My uniform top (and boots) is off, I'm standing butt cheeks akimbo and being patted, wanded, frisked and lectured. Oh, and they took my Visine! And searched my bag for the Uno cards that I CLEARLY stated I left at home.

Ugh - some people have no sense of humor!

Getting to Djibouti

I'm here! Getting here was painful - to say the least.

When I woke up Tuesday morning to snow, I should have just gone right back to bed, because it was a sure sign that hell was freezing over. But no... I pushed on.

I was supposed to leave Little Rock at 12:10 Tuesday. We boarded at 1 and then sat at the end of the run way for an hour waiting to be able to take off (weather). We finally took off, flew 10 minutes and turned back around because of weather in Atlanta.

We took off again at 5:15 and by the time I got to ATL I had missed all my connections. I got put on a 9:30 p.m. flight out of ATL that boarded at 11:55, but because of a mechanical problem, didn't actually take off until 12:20 a.m. Then we got to Virgina and because of weather, we got to circle for an hour. So... I missed my rotator by a good 8 hours. And then TMO SENT ME HOME!!!!

So I claimed my bags in Norfolk at 3:45 a.m., took them right back to Delta and got back on the same plane I had just gotten off. No lie. Got to Atlanta at 8:10 a.m. (still haven't been to sleep) to be told I'm not coming home - I'm going to Baltimore. So I flew from ATL to Cinncianati to BWI. And when I got there... NO BAGS. Of couse. Now, this is literally five flights in 34 hours and I haven't even left the U.S. yet!

I got to BWI at 2:30 p.m. Wednesday, my bags got there at 9:51 p.m. and I had to check in for my next flight by 10 p.m. Just made it...

Flew from Baltimore (where we were delayed for maintenance) to Germany. There, we were once again delayed for maintenance. Then we flew to Italy. There, we were delayed because of an in-flight emergency. Then we flew to Al Udied, where I got to sit and wait for 36 hours for a flight.

THANK YOU to the men of the 463rd AG out of Little Rock who came from Iraq to Qatar to fly me to Djibouti. Without them, I'd still be sitting in a tent waiting for a plane!

So, all told, I left home Tuesday morning and slept in my first bed on Friday night and got to Africa on Saturday at dinner time. I hope the trip back is better!

***A special thanks goes to Agent Rick Pearson, who showed at at BWI at 2:30 Thursday and provided me with car service, baggage help, a hotel to shower in, a hot meal, a trip to both Target and Wal*Mart, drug my bags through all of BWI at 10 at night and then put me on a plane with a smile and a warm hug.

***Thank you as well to Mike and Leigh! They pulled me off a plane in Italy in before anyone else, I got to sit in the terminal with them for about 45 minutes, and I got hugs, pictures and a goody bag for the plane.

I am blessed with some incredible friends!